Reading: The Southern Book Club’s Guide to Slaying Vampires by Grady Hendrix

This book popped up as an ad somewhere, (Facebook, TikTok, Amazon, something) and the cover and title grabbed my attention. I thought it’d be a cute, cozy read I could listen to during my commute and when I’m walking my dog late at night. Fuck no. It’s not that. This is not it. I judged this book by its cover and I was dead fucking wrong. It’s not in fact cute or cozy. Is it well written? Yes. Am I going to finish it? Of course. But this is not what I signed up for. Also, I’m pretty sure that Grady Hendrix hates women. There is some weird weakass woman shit happening here.

This is the first audiobook that I’ve listened to that had a “dramatic adaptation.” So it feels very different than the other audiobooks I’ve listened to. I’m not exactly sure if I like this style, I think for some people it’s great but for me, it takes away my ability to create my own voices for the characters in my head and this morning I was in the car backing out of my garage, and I almost smashed into the wall because on the audiobook there was a car horn honking, and it was so damn realistic I thought somebody was honking at me. In my driveway. That wasn’t even supposed to be a scary part of the book, but it scared the hell out of me. TBD if I’ll be seeking out additional audiobooks read with a full cast or if I’ll go back to my traditionally narrated audiobooks.

Right now it’s late and I’m getting ready for bed, usually I’d listen to my audiobook in the bathroom while I’m putting on the myriad of beauty products I need to use so that my skin does not peel off my face now that I’m over 40. But I’m not listening to my audiobook because I’m scared, because I’m a big baby and I don’t want to dream the dreams that will come if I listen to this book right before bed so I will probably lay in bed and after my son falls asleep I will read a little Debra Webb until I get tired. But I do really wanna know what happens next and so it’s killing me not to listen to it right now. Obviously I don’t read a lot of horror books nor do I watch any “scary” movies. I’m still a little grossed out from the scene in Yesteryear (spoiler alert!!) where Natalie gets her foot caught in the animal trap and her daughter sews her ankle back together. Just raw dogs it. Seriously living rent free in my head forever.

Now that I think about it that’s not true. Before I had my son I like reading pretty dark books, but somewhere along the lines I became a big baby. I don’t know, maybe I should try reading more horror and dark books, maybe just not on audiobook. I guess it’s to be seen. Next month is October. 

Okay, back to the book. 

Honestly, the first third of the book was pretty slow. It felt like it took a long time to stop setting the stage and actually get into the story. But now it’s chugging along one gross scene after another. I’ll let you know how it goes.